My past is behind me

So sometimes it takes something scary to happen in your life to wake you up to who and what really counts in life. I have always put my family first but I know I can do more to make sure I am there for them both 100%. Now that we have moved I can focus on them and not worrying about who I will see or what people say. I am away from it all finally and if feels so nice to be free. I go to sleep every night feeling content and at peace. I don't really care who reads up on me or looks at my stuff because I know I have left that awful place and life has not been better. No more battles for me YOU win! I choose to leave my past behind :) and to build on my future with my family. I forgot I am so excited about taking Todd to go see Carrie Underwood! He loves her and he has always went with me to see music I love so now its all about him. I like her too but he LOVES her haha. We both decided to get our tattoos done by June. He wants Madison's face tattooed on his back and I have two I want :) My ankle I am going to get something to do with my family not sure yet. But on my back I am getting my pinup girl Bettie page baseball tattoo! Its going to hurt like hell with how big its going to be. Its going to cost alot for both of ours so we are going to save up til June to get them. Plus we are both super picky about who does them. We have to know it will not be sloppy or unoriginal. I know where I want mine done but he is aiming high LOL he wants Kat Von D to do his or someone in her shop. We will have to wait and see about that haha.

I also know I misjudged someone and felt really bad about it. Now that we are talking again I feel so much better. I know I will have to rebuild my trust with them and try harder than ever to show I want to be their friend again. The time and effort is truly worth it. I know that I feel so much better now that I am attempting to undo something I did that was so wrong. I know I am a stubborn person and make mistakes but realizing that you made them is HUGE!

My hubby went back to work today after having 13days off and I miss him so much! I have been so used to having him here all the time. I hate that we will both have to work for now. As soon as I get my bachelors that will be done because I can work 3 12hour shifts and be home more. With the money he can afford to work less as well. At least we have opposite schedules so we don't have to have our daughter grow up in day care. She starts preschool in June. We have to wait til she gets her echo cardiogram before she can start or at least I will feel better when she has it. I am the overprotective mom that wants to make sure she is totally healthy before she starts. She is doing well thank god. I never felt so much support as I did when she was sick. So many people made the far trip to come see her. I was overloaded with messages on facebook and texts daily asking for updates on her. I am so grateful for the wonderful people in our lives.

moving forward

So now that the storm has calmed down, I finally feel relaxed and at home. I love our new place so far. We had a blast at tiesto as always :) I loved dressing up and having people tell me how cute I looked. I had a girl follow me into the bathroom to take a picture with me because she loved my outfit so much. Then this Asian girl was all over me on the dance floor lol. She asked if she could take me to her room. I told my hubby and he thought it was funny because I am so totally anti-female. Women just will not ever do anything for me. But it was extremely flattering. I felt super sexy all night. My hubby looked so hot too. Could not keep my hands off of him. I do have to say I prefer the massives more than the clubs. I have never been a bar or club kind of girl. People at bars are just so moody and looking for a piece of ass. Then at massives its all about love of music and dancing.

Today I am going to pick up madison's first sleep over play date :) She is going to have a blast. I am going to go all out. Bought avatar for them to watch or Alvin and the chipmunks the squeakual. Got some glow sticks for the night time and plan on some ice cream time too. I cannot wait to do more as she gets older. I want to be the cool mom that hooks up the sleepovers. :) I am so happy she is feeling better Kawasaki's disease is no joke. She is still sore but alot better and in need of some company. My dad bought her this giant stuffed dragon and she named it Kawasaki lol she is so freaking adorable. I love her to death.

family events

Isn't he adorable??? Now I really want another one :)


So my grandma fell and broke her hip which totally sucks because now they have to do a full hip replacement on her. She already has Parkinson's which makes it hard for her to walk so I don't know how well this is going to work out for her. I have been at the hospital almost everyday for the last two weeks. With my brother in law there for his cancer, my grandmother and her hip, and last night my closest cousin had her baby boy. What a scare that gave me. He came out not breathing for like 7 MINUTES!!! Just as they were about to stick a tube down him he started breathing on his own. Thank you god for answering a room full of prayers. His cord was around his neck and scared the crap out of all of us. He is doing great now and such a cutie.

I have no clue how I am going to get all my packing done. It feels like when we get settled down about one thing, another thing pops up. We decided not to buy the home we were going for because we got offered an amazing deal on another one that we could not pass up. So we are still moving just not to where we had planned. Sometimes life throws you curve balls and you just have to deal with it. I just want to be out of where we are and away from people. I got offered a new job as well with a HOSPITAL omg that could not be passed up as well. This place is going to pay for my bachelors if I sign a five year contract with them :) Why the hell not with awesome pay and school paid for its a given. Todd and I are planning a little get away in two weeks so we can take a break from this madness lol. So hopefully by the beginning of next month things will be calmed down. Then with less stress its time to try to add a lil one to our family. I cannot wait to expand our happy home. Now we will have lots of room to do so hehe.

GOOD bye

Packing is moving along slowly but surely. I cannot wait to be moved! Then its time to start trying for our next lil one :) We have been waiting til we move so it will be less stress. Finally we can just focus on us. No more family or friend worries. I guess I am pretty selfish about my family because I would love to just have life be about me and my family. Who cares what happens in other peoples lives?

Next weekend is Tiesto again BABY! Such a lucky girl to have so much going well. Tiesto right before we move sets it off right. He is an amazing artist. I cannot get enough of him. My hubby loves him too which makes it so much fun. We dance the night away til our feet hurt. Cant wait.....