My past is behind me

So sometimes it takes something scary to happen in your life to wake you up to who and what really counts in life. I have always put my family first but I know I can do more to make sure I am there for them both 100%. Now that we have moved I can focus on them and not worrying about who I will see or what people say. I am away from it all finally and if feels so nice to be free. I go to sleep every night feeling content and at peace. I don't really care who reads up on me or looks at my stuff because I know I have left that awful place and life has not been better. No more battles for me YOU win! I choose to leave my past behind :) and to build on my future with my family. I forgot I am so excited about taking Todd to go see Carrie Underwood! He loves her and he has always went with me to see music I love so now its all about him. I like her too but he LOVES her haha. We both decided to get our tattoos done by June. He wants Madison's face tattooed on his back and I have two I want :) My ankle I am going to get something to do with my family not sure yet. But on my back I am getting my pinup girl Bettie page baseball tattoo! Its going to hurt like hell with how big its going to be. Its going to cost alot for both of ours so we are going to save up til June to get them. Plus we are both super picky about who does them. We have to know it will not be sloppy or unoriginal. I know where I want mine done but he is aiming high LOL he wants Kat Von D to do his or someone in her shop. We will have to wait and see about that haha.

I also know I misjudged someone and felt really bad about it. Now that we are talking again I feel so much better. I know I will have to rebuild my trust with them and try harder than ever to show I want to be their friend again. The time and effort is truly worth it. I know that I feel so much better now that I am attempting to undo something I did that was so wrong. I know I am a stubborn person and make mistakes but realizing that you made them is HUGE!

My hubby went back to work today after having 13days off and I miss him so much! I have been so used to having him here all the time. I hate that we will both have to work for now. As soon as I get my bachelors that will be done because I can work 3 12hour shifts and be home more. With the money he can afford to work less as well. At least we have opposite schedules so we don't have to have our daughter grow up in day care. She starts preschool in June. We have to wait til she gets her echo cardiogram before she can start or at least I will feel better when she has it. I am the overprotective mom that wants to make sure she is totally healthy before she starts. She is doing well thank god. I never felt so much support as I did when she was sick. So many people made the far trip to come see her. I was overloaded with messages on facebook and texts daily asking for updates on her. I am so grateful for the wonderful people in our lives.